MEMORIES

Eskom speel woer-woer met ons deur die load shedding-skedule na hartelus te verander (wanneer die aanvraag op sy laagste is, tydens die Desember-vakansie). "Squirrel" Ramaphosa oorleef Farmgate (vir nou). 26 mense dood in Boksburg in 'n ontploffing van 'n tenkwa wat LPG-gas vervoer toe dié onder 'n spoorwegbrug vassit. As jy nou hier was, sou ons hierdie nuusgebeure tot in die fynste detail bespreek het - veral daardie ontploffing - want risikobestuur was mos jou kos! Na my ma se afsterwe op 5 Desember hoor ek jou sê: "Praat met jou ma terwyl jy nog kan" - wanneer sy gebel het en langer gepraat het as waarvoor ek miskien lus was. Vandag is dit 365 dae - een jaar - sedert jy nie meer met ons is nie en ek mis jou goeie geselskap meer as ooit. Maar jou lewenslesse en segswyses leef voort wanneer ek gereeld vir een van my kinders sê: "Soos oom Leo altyd gesê het", of ek een van jou vele wyshede neerpen in my redaksioneel in 'n weeklikse nuusbrief. Net voor ek te morbied kan raak oor daar nou so in "ons bos gekap word" (ook jou uitdrukking), kom daar op die dag na Kersfees 'n nuwe asempie onverwags en onaangekondig by die huis aan; my plek is nog altyd 'n tehuis vir "verdwaalde katte". En net so onaangekondig en onverwags (of dalk nie) kruip sy in my hart in en vul sy 'n groot leemte. Soos my ander katjies sou Lilith - nou so drie, vier maande oud - jou ook uitgesoek het om by te kom lê, en sou ek agterna met antihistamien die ergste hooikoorssimptome behandel. Die volgende 365 dae sal nie makliker wees nie, maar Lilith sal haar deel doen om die leemte en leegte in my hart te vul en al die verlies so 'n bietjie draagliker te maak. 😻

"It's not the plane, it's the pilot." "I'm not a teacher. I'm a fighter pilot. "It's not what I am. It's who I am. How do I teach that?" F-18s flying in the official music video of Hold my hand by Lady Gaga, which plays at the end of the movie: https://youtu.be/O2CIAKVTOrc Admiral Tom "Iceman" Kazansky tells Captain Pete "Maverick" Mitchell: "It's time to let go". Pete answers: "I don't know how". Neither do I. I wish you could have watched the movie with me. You would have loved it (and criticised it too, I'm sure!). I will never forget your deep-seated love and passion for flying. I miss you! 💔

"... I wish that heaven had visiting hours I would ask them if I could take you home. But I know what they'd say, that it's for the best So I will live life the way you taught me, and make it on my own ... "... And I will close the door, but I will open my heart And everyone I love will know exactly who you are 'Cause this is not goodbye, it is just 'til we meet again So much has changed since you've been away." - Ed Sheeran: Visiting hours Our last roadtrip was to the Kruger National Park, 28 April to 1 May 2021. You took a detour and changed our booking so that I could see the hotel on the bridge (we didn't know that we wouldn't be able to see it "up close and personal" but only from a distance). We enjoyed dinner at one of the restaurants there and spent the night at Skukuza. The following morning we made our way to Letaba later than planned because you had overslept; I pretended not to notice. Usually a hive of activity, Lake Panic had already quieted down; it was well after "sparrows' f*rt": how you referred to an early-morning-before-sunrise start. Special times, although I sensed that something was amiss. If only I knew then what I know now, but hindsight is 20/20 vision... "Ek is useless sonder jou."